Thoughts on Last Week’s Debate, The Garb Controversy, and Sex Bomb Tim Russert

As brog readers know, I’m loth to discuss American politics, but recent events have inspired this domestic politics hermit to emerge from his proverbial panda cave. First, the pictures of Obama in traditional (Though the New York Post’s headline, “Bum Wrap,” almost made it permissible) Somali garb released by a Clinton campaign member in an attempt to intensify scrutiny over Obama’s pseudo-Muslim background was despicable and poorly reasoned. This is why I don’t think Hilldawg is behind it. I have many nasty things to say about her, but she ain’t dumb. She knows that dressing up in local attire while travelling abroad for photo-ops is an American political tradition! Hell, she’s done it on a number of occasions. If we’re going to criticize Barack the Islamic tribal leader in Somalia, then we have to condemn Hilldawg, the Egyptian madrassah teacher and Hilldawg, the Vietnamese rice paddy farmer!

 

 

-What’s the over under on how many times Hilldawg has referred to Obama as the ‘n-bomb’ off camera during this campaign? It’s gotta be at least four digits.

Debate puntos! First, none of the pundits would say so, but they were all thinking it. Hilldawg was SUCH a bitch tonight! (I like the fact that Obama said the word “ditch” about Hilldawg over and over again. The fact that he did not have a slip of tongue means he’s a worthy president!) During the initial round of sparring concerning health care, she was so, just, rude to moderator Brian Williams, and over what was really just a fringe aspect of the universal health care concept. Then, after getting two questions in a row, she whined about how she always gets the first question. I’d expect this (which I perceived to be blatant preemptive excuse-making) from a sixth grader, but from the next President of the United States (no one better take that quote out of context)? Can we expect a similar snarky reaction for occurrences that are out of her control, such as if Serbia violates Kosovo’s newfound sovereignty or if the Japanese Yen freefalls? “But, but President Bush didn’t have to deal with a weak Asian economy!” Really, I found her performance to be just so offputting, and, honestly, immature. Many positive descriptions apply to our friend Hilldawg: intelligent, formidable, tough. But ‘presidential’ isn’t one of them.

-Though, I must say, it’s pretty impressive that Hilldawg hasn’t slipped and called him “Black” Obama yet. She obviously does not run in the same circles that I do.

My most favoritest question of the debate was the one concerning Russia’s imminent election. I liked it because it was slightly out of the box (obviously neither were expecting it), but fairly open-ended, allowing the candidates to demonstrate some knowledge on the subject. Hilldawg (ironically) seized the opportunity to go first, but she didn’t know the frontrunner’s effing name, referring to him only as “Putin’s handpicked successor” and the moderator totally called her out on it! She was able to come up with the first syllable, but not much else. After Tim Russert, the sexiest man alive tried to aid her with her articulation, she scoffed when she was unable to pronounce it with a condescending: “whatever.” You fucking arrogant bitch and your implied cultural superiority! Do you think Russia is going to forget this? Russiya is a G-8 country, and you don’t know who is running for president! (I knew, but I sit at home and brog all day, so I don’t really count). His name is Dmitry Medvedev, and its pronounced just like it looks. If Zyuganov had been the frontrunner again, as he was in ’96, then I’d be a little more lenient towards Hilldawg. And neither candidate cited the fact that Putin has publicly announced he had aspirations for (a more accurate phraseology would be claiming the position of”) Prime Minister of Russia. And Hilldawg claimed that Barack currently is, in terms of foreign policy expertise, where W. was in 2000. After last night’s performance, Hilldawg would be lucky to even get merit that distinction! Both of them rely on memorized facts of predetermined issues, not an actual grasp on the factors and happenings that constitute the game of international politics. It’s a shame the foreign affairs McDaddy hadn’t been there; it would’ve been a truly embarrassing two-holing.

Yet Another Reason Why I Am Disturbed By A Potential Clinton Presidency

The Economist’s columnist with the pen name“Lexington” brought up an interesting point a few weeks ago: if Hilldawg is elected, what exactly is Mr. Clinton going to do? He wields so much power, can we trust him and his jetset diplomacy under the guise of philanthropy? This article in The New York Times justifies illustrates my trepidation over a Bill Clinton without a leash. In September of 2005, Bill Clinton and commodity financier Frank Giustra found themselves at a banquet dinner in the Presidential palace of Central Asian republic of Kazakhstan. During this extravagant feast hosted by Kazakh prespot (this term will catch on!) Nursultan Nazarbayev, Bill Clinton enthusiastically lent his support for the Kazakh leader’s bid to preside over the Organization for Security and Cooperation in Europe or OSCE, a group responsible for monitoring elections and advocating democracy in the Old World. Well, Nazarbayev is the ideal candidate: he’s a purveyor of democracy, free elections, and inter-faction dialogue. Wait, no he’s not! He makes my top 10 worst dictators in the world. He hasn’t relinquished control of the Kazakh state since its inception. He won the last election with 91% of the vote in which all dissident groups were quelled. He squanders government funds in a manner that would make the Sultan of Brunei proud. Oh, and he’s certifiably mental. He decided to move the capital from the country’s largest city and economic capital, the surprisingly temperate Almaty (or Alma Ata)to Astana, which is more centrally located, but is one of the most uninhabitable places in the world to presumably create a “Potemkin Village” in order to fool foreign investors into pouring money into the country. The dry desert steppes are insufferably hot in the summer (35-40 degrees Celsius) and are terribly frigid in the winter (wind chill temperatures around -35 to -40 Celsius). Most government officials refuse to reside in the uncomfortable capital and commute every week from Almaty to Astana, driving up the number of funds that are wasted. In addition to moving the capital to Astana, Nazarbayev decided to build a major international airport costing hundreds of millions of dollars in Astana, hoping to attract both Asian and European air carriers as a stopover point between the Far East and the EU. Apparently Nazarbayev was unaware of any developments in the airline industry over the past two decades, because airplanes like the Boeing 777 and Airbus A340 can make the trip easily from all points in Asia to Europe without any payload restrictions. Anyone remotely familiar with the airline business knows that the fastest way to alienate lucrative business passengers and annoy average economy passengers is to introduce an unnecessary stop en route. Obviously, with the exception of shuttle flights to Almaty, and a handful of flights to fellow CIS capitals (recent weekly flights to Frankfurt and Istanbul were recently introduced, but this still does not justify such a lavish construction), the airport is mostly deserted, constituting a monumental waste in funds. Back to the point, why on Earth would our friend Biller support the candidacy of Nazarbayev? As this NY Times article informs us, his friend Giustra is a newbie in the uranium industry, and a contract in mineral rich Kazakhstan would really help him enter the market. Low and behold, the contract is awarded, and a $31 million donation finds its way to one of the Clinton’s foundations courtesy of Mr. Giustra. Clearly, Mr. Clinton is willing to engage in business deals with unscrupulous leaders for his own monetary benefit, which could obviously be detrimental to our country. Though the majority of his international activities are quite charitable, it’s actions like these that trouble me (not to mention Hilldawg in general!).

The French Did Get a Few Things Right…

The age of consent is still 15. Count it!

-As well, their train system (SNCF) is simply immaculate. I’m actually blogging on the TGV (France’s high speed train) as we speak. The difference between the United States and France is that France invested heavily in the infrastructure of a high speed network, whereas the United States merely haphazardly attempted to implement such a system. Granted, trains are not economically viable throughout much of the United States as a result of the large distances between major cities, especially out west. However, the northeastern corridor stretching from Washington to Boston is ideal for a high speed train network, and could potentially be an economic windfall for a rapidly fading Amtrak. The two major differences between this region and the rest of the country are relatively self-evident, but are the two principal factors why a real high speed train would actually be viable if the US were willing to spend a sizable chunk of change completely revamping existing tracks, (This is the principal reason why Acela is so pitiful. They only have modified tracks in small stretches of rural Rhode Island, Massachusetts, and Connecticut, meaning the vast majority of the trip takes place under 100 mph): the geographical proximity of cities along the Eastern Seaboard and pre-existing mass transit infrastructure. France has a similar corridor running down the spine of l’Hexagon between Paris, Lyon, and Marseille. The distance between these three cities is relatively the same as Washington-New York-Boston, but it only takes two hours to travel via TGV between Paris and Lyon, and only a further hour and a half to Marseille. Given the frequent delays at airports, the infuriating security screening process, and the added convenience of downtown to downtown to travel, it seems almost paradoxical that the United States has yet to embrace a genuine high speed train system.

Post-modern racism?

Prior to my transatlantic voyage, I ventured to the polls to support mi hombre McCain and vote against O-town’s d-bag of a mayor. While at the polls, a young, mixed race couple (black boy, white girl) was having trouble voting because they were originally registered in other counties, but now reside in the greatest city on Earth (disagree? Read the lead-in). After twenty minutes of waiting, the folks in Tallahassee finally called back, and it was deemed that the young African-American male would indeed be able to vote, but for some unexplained, surely bureaucratically-laden reason, the white woman would not have the opportunity. Upon hearing this, the guy turned to his girlfriend and said, a little too excitedly, I kid you not, “you’re not allowed to vote, you have to get out of here!” I have never had to hold my tongue that badly in my entire life. I actually bit down on it to prevent a, err, mishap. I desperately wanted to make an ironic disenfranchisement joke, but for the sake of my high cheek bones, I refrained. In the immortal words of South Park, “If irony were made of strawberries, we’d all be drinking smoothies right now.”